An Englishman In The East v2

Poor little neglected blog… Still, there are reasons why this blog hasn’t been updated in quite a while.

Firstly is work. Being the ADoS takes up quite a bit of time with scheduling, arranging courses and generally doing stuff; and with the summer session upon us, it’s getting hectic and there’ll only be one day off next week and the same until the end of August.

Next was the re-design of www.JavaProductions.net and the creation of www.ChinaOnABike.com. Interestingly enough, a search on Google for Java Productions turns up my site at number one! That’s certainly a first! The other site (www.ChinaOnABike.com) is a new venture between myself and Dave Weller. We are planning to tour around China on motorbikes because it’s never been done before. Our first journey will be in October to visit the 5 Great Peaks of China. Luckily, they’re not all that far away… Well… I say that, but the journey is enough milage to get from John O’Groats to Lands End and back a couple of times. So far, we’ve got some equipment like a POV camera, helmets and stuff, but no actual bikes yet. That’s going to come around the end of July along with me taking a motorcycle test here in China. The other thing is that the bikes are only 150cc (due to legal restrictions) but once we’ve got a couple of trips under our belt, we’re going to look into importing some 750cc bikes (maximum limit allowed… But not sold in China…). Also, upon completion of a tour or two, we’ll be offering our services to take people around China on the bikes. Our package will include the hire of the bike, guiding around the roads and some places of interest, hotels / hostels /food and, of course, petrol. Almost a fully inclusive deal. People would just need their bike clothes, maybe a helmet (but we could lend one out) and money for souvenirs. The other trouble we have is that it would be purely motorbikes… We don’t have a support vehicle… Which could be a problem if people bring luggage. We’ll work on that, though. Dave should be getting a full driving licence, and I’m sure I’ll go for it next year too, so we could take turns driving the support van and riding on the bikes.

The final reason the blog’s been neglected is due to me attempting to learn how to use Adobe After Effects to a reasonably fair standard. I think I’m getting the hang of it, but there’s a few things that I need to polish. In the end, it can only help Java Productions and should it be resurrected upon a return to England, I’ll be safe in the knowledge that my post-production skills are better than they were at the time of Experienced TV.

There’s nothing more really to say. Nothing really new has happened recently. Spring is going to her family for a couple of weeks starting from tomorrow and I’ll be left to fend for myself. Knowing me, I’ll be spending most of that either at school or just lazing around and playing games on the computer. It also means late nights as I’m not too good at keeping an eye on the time to go to bed. With all that in mind, I’ll probably post another update next week, but until then: Catch you later!

It seems once in a while the video gaming industry comes under attack, and whilst it’s usually the violent games the get the full brunt of the media attention, this month it’s been a Japanese game that, whilst it is a little violent, is different in the way it deals with it… The game, of course is RapeLay, a hentai game in which the aim is to er… rape…

It’s not the first Japanese game to be like this though, having played the blatently named “Battle Raper” before, so I thought I’d see what all the fuss is about and promptly headed off to find a copy on a torrent site somewhere…

After installing it and applying the crack, deleting all the viruses that came with the crack and figuring out that where it had unpacked the crack to wasn’t the actual game directory, then getting a message saying that I couldn’t play it because I wasn’t a resident of Japan (interesting…). That when I figured out that the patcher hadn’t patched anything at all and I had to do it all manually with a vrappy program that came with the ‘patch’ and finally I managed to get it up (er… that’s a bad choice of phrase) and running… Although by this time I was just thinking “Why am I even bothering with this when I could be laying on the sofa, half-asleep watching Doctor Who… Or Shaun The Sheep instead. Still, I wanted to find out what was so hideously bad about this particular hentai game that I thought I’d plod on…

Whilst the game was patched to English, the 3D models are still censored (I’m sure there’s a patch for that, but after spending 30 minutes applying the translation patch, I just couldn’t be bothered) and if you’re after hot hentai action out of the box, this one really isn’t for you… But what about the game itself? Well, if you haven’t clicked away by now, allow me to continue:

The ‘game’ (and I use that term loosely) starts with you being arrested for being a pervert and you move to three girls, one of whom grassed you up. You then decide to ‘take revenge’ on all three and you follow one of them to a train station. From there, it’s mostly about groping the girls until their ‘love meter’ gets high enough that you can progress to the next stage… Now… The time comes to actually do something after they have enough feelings for you… Technically, that’s consetual sex, not rape… Admittedly, the first part is sexual assault or harrasment, but it’s not (as some of my friends call it) “surprise sex”… Also, it takes sodding ages to get to that point and if it wasn’t for people bangin on about it (wrong choice of phrase again) then I’d have switched it off after the first 20 to 30 minutes of… er… ‘playing’?

Personally, I didn’t find it any different to any of the other hentai games out there, or the fascination in quite a few Japanese porn movies providing ‘rape’ as a fantasy thing. Maybe some people do have that as a fetish, and each to their own, but I didn’t feel this was as perverse as some of the other things I’ve seen coming from Japan. Also, the collision detection was terrible… Imagine you’re “doing the dirty” and suddenly your member pops out the side of her leg… Disconcerting to say the least.

The only thing I can see people getting worked up about is the whole abortion thing. If you blow your load andshe gets pregnant, it gives you the option to have the abortion… Now, if this is really the only thing that people are getting worked up about, then it’s a piss poor reaction. That’s a debate which has been going on for decades, and just because this game offers you the coathanger option, it’s not a reason to get aggitated. Leave your stupid debates for outside of the gaming world and concentrate on the real one where your opinions count. Me? I agree with both sides. On one side, I can see that life is life and deserves a chance, but on the other, I believe that people have a right to choose. Technically, a baby is not a baby until it is removed from the mother and the umbilical cord is cut. Before that time you could call it a symbiote since it is dependant on the mother and is biologically connected. What happens if you cut the umbilical cord before the baby is due to be born? It’d die. It can’t sustain itself outside of the mother or ‘host’… And now I’m going on about something unrelated that has taken me off topic so I should get back to what I was initially talking about…

After expecting to be disgusted with RapeLay from all the criticism it got, I came to one conclusion: It’s a shitty hentai game. Even with the whole death threat thing and intimidation stuff you can do, there’s nothing major about it that hasn’t been seen in hyper-violent games before. I just don’t see this ‘game’ (for want of a better description) being any more than a hyped up piece of erotica. It’s almost like a simulator with so much crap bolted onto it that for most regular hentai game players would be too much. The game is a pain in the arse to patch, crack and install, and that’s something you’d HAVE to do if you’re trying to play outside of Japan. In all, I just say forget about it, move your attentions to real-life and get on with finding something else to point a finger at while I extend my middle finger to those who think video games have an adverse effect on people.

With that said, I’ll just say: Catch you later.

P.S.: It wasn’t a review… I didn’t play it long enough since it just got so bloody boring. It’s now uninstalled and I consider it a waste of my time that I should sue the publishers for since I can’t have that time back… Honestly, even if you’re curious about it, don’t bother downloading it. It’s about 2.5Gb of crap.

It’s been a while… Defilately. This month sees me purchasing a new motorbike. Next week, I’ll have to buy a helmet next week and then, from there, I will head out of town to pick up my new motorbike. Technically, it’s not a great bike (only 150cc) but it will do for my plan of touring China’s 5 great peaks. Something I’m looking forward to very much. It’s going to start around the October National Holiday and last for about 15 days. I’ve put a fair amount of planning into the route and stops and now it moves to the other part (probably an important part) of planning camping equipment and food. Which also means finding out about getting panniers that can take everything needed to ’survive’ as it were… The only piece of equipment that I’ve bought so far is an emergency charger which is a big battery that connects to the Nokia and has enough power to recharge it 3 or 4 times. Very useful since I’m using it as the primary GPS… It’s all very exciting, though.

I would have updated my photos and tweets, but for some reason, Twitter and Flickr have been blocked. I know why. And I’m not mentioning it. Don’t want this blog to be blocked as well. I will be putting all of the information about the tour on a website (hopefully with a new domain name) for you all to see and check out. I’ll also be producing vlogs of the trip and prep and loads of photos. Still working on the design and ideas for the site, but I’ll hopefully have the test one running in the next couple of months.

Where did the inspiration come from? Initially, it came from Top Gear. Not Long Way Round, as some people seem to think. In the last episode of series 12, the Top Gear team were shipped to South Vietnam and given some cash and told to get to the north of the country in a week (something the Americans never managed). The money wasn’t enough for a car, so they bought bikes. Mopeds and Russian bikes… It looked like so much fun and a big adventure that I wanted to try something like it. Then someone lent Long Way Round to me and it strengthened my resolve to have a motorbike adventure. I also watched Long Way Down, but that wasn’t as good… It seemed like rich folks on holiday and it was all about going from A to B within a deadline. None of the cultural feel of Long Way Round.

Aside from being busy, I can’t think of anything more to add here… But, if I can think of anything, I’ll be sure to pop it up and let you know what’s going on. Until then: Catch you later!

Well, I can officially announce it now. I have just received a promotion! I am now the Assistant Director of Studies at EF Xi’an North. I’m in charge of the day-to-day running of the school as of today. True, it’s my day off, but I’m just waiting for the schedule to arrive in my inbox so I can prepare for next week. I get a little increase in salary, but less teaching hours. It’s a new position at the school and hopefully it will be a good opportunity for the future as well. If I do well, I might even get the full Director of Studies position one day. This is a good step towards that goal. Not sure if there’s a position higher than DoS, but at least I have another goal to aim for now that I’ve risen above the teacher position. It also bodes well for any future transitions if my plans take me back to England as it’s now similar to an Assistant Dept. Head role in some respects. Feeling good about this. It’s going to go well.

Also, this week has been a bit of an interesting weekend of classes. One of our teachers ran off for some reason (something we’ll need to look at in the future… That’s the third… There’s got to be something underlying it…) so we were all busy taking over classes and with Stephen on holiday, it meant big shifts during those times. Next week should be a little easier. Been using the guitar in my classes for a bit of musical English teaching. Got a nice little version of “Head, shoulders, knees and toes” going with help from Jason. The kids seemed to like it, too. Next week will be a little more difficult for them, but easing them into the work nice and gently should help them out a bit.

Spring was applying for a job to be cabin crew with Qatar airlines this week, but she was rejected at the final session. It’s a shame because it was a really high paying job, but good because it means we can be together more. We’ve decided that we’d need to plan and save for the future as best as we can. She’s going to look for a better job with more salary and I’m going to work hard at the ADoS position to hopefully rise up to the next level.

We’re still planning on buying a motorbike next month so that we can travel a little around the province and maybe a little further… Dave’s also interested in joining in since he’s got a taste for adventure going on the Mongolian Rally.I’m getting a Qian Jiang motorbike. It’s only 150cc, but it’ll do the job. I’ve seen a really nice bike on the net by Harley Davidson called the Night Rod… It looks like a sexy beast. I’d love to get that, but they’re not street legal here in China… It seems 150cc is the most common one you can get here… It was even a struggle to find 250cc and when you did, they’re damned expensive. Hate to think how much a 750cc would be… Extortionate comes to mind. The Harley is only $15,000.. But here, that’s that same price of a small apartment… And over a year’s salary. It’s just crazy… But justifiable… If I can have time to think on that one…

Anyways, my inbox has just popped up with the schedule. Time to work on that. Until next time: Catch you later!

Well, this week was my wedding to Spring. It took place in Meixian on May 3rd with over 400 guests. In total, there were only 2 foreigners in attendance: Myself and Francisco. The rest were all Chinese. Susan, Michael and Cathy (with her husband) also came from school, which was lovely. I am still comprehending what happened on the day as it was relatively short…

We got up at 6am to get ready and I started by washing my hair, shaving and donning my new suit (had a shower the night before). Then things seemed to slow down. I sat downstairs and had breakfast (a couple of eggs in sweet water and some noodles) then watched them set off the firecrackers and these huge… what I can only describe as… bombs. Then it was all go! Everyone arrived at the house and I was ushered upstairs to have a couple of photos taken with Spring.

Whilst all of the traditions in China were being followed, I was still adamant that I would not see Spring in her wedding dress until the day and she looked STUNNING. Then began the ritual stuff. It started with me knocking on her bedroom door and getting her friends to force entry… Which was strange. Outside were 4 guys… Inside were two kids and one of Springs female friend’s… They must have been strong to hold that door closed. Once they’d got a foot in the door, we gave them red packs with some money inside to allow us in. She was sitting on the bed looking absolutely elegant. I gave her the bouquet of roses on one knee and we sent to the upstairs living room to see her family. I had to light her father’s cigarette and give them tea, then we bowed to her family (because I felt uncomfortable kneeling at their feet – Remember: Man kneels before none but God… Even though I’m athiest… Which means I’ll never kneel… Or failing the presence of God, man-with-gun would probably work). Told her mother and father that I would take care of her and that I was now going to take her away. A few more photos and then we went downstairs.

I carried her out of the door and into the car, where I had to put her shoes on and then we bagan the parade through town. There were about 12 cars in total (I think… I didn’t see them all) and we were, naturally in the lead car. I was in the passenger seat, Spring was in the back seat behind me. We drove through the whole town until we came to the restaurant. We went upstairs to have a rest before going down to meet the guests. Then at about 11:30, everything started.

We walked into the restaurant along the red carpet behind two ‘virgins’… I had to use my imagination on that one… They didn’t look like virgins, but it was a nice thought. We stood on the stage while the host was talking and then we performed some things together on stage. Lighting candles, filling champagne glasses, cutting a cake (which was brought in on a shopping trolley…) and drinking a glass of red wine together. I also had to bow to her parents again and call them ‘ba’ and ‘ma’ to show that I accepted them as my family-in-law and they gave me some money for that (101 yuan, which means ‘for the whole of your life’ or something like that…).

After this, Spring went to get changed into her Chinese dress (Qi Pao) and again, I hadn’t seen it before this moment… Absolutely amazing. We went back downstairs to the restaurant and went to each table giving drinks to everyone. By this time, quite a few people had started to leave because to all intents and purposes, the wedding had finished. So 12:30, it was all done. We started at the house around 10:30 and it was over in 2 hours. Chinese weddings are short.

The other thing is that it was so tiring! We got back and slept for a few hours before getting up and having dinner. Everyone said what a beautiful ceremony it was and the best the town had seen. Also, the only one that had included a foreigner… I’d paid 20,000 yuan for the ceremony (which is roughly £2,000) and then found out the actual cost of everything came to 35,000 yuan (£3,500). Spring parents had given us the other 15,000. That’s a £1,500 wedding gift… I was stunned. What the hell do you say to something like that? “Thank you” is’nt really enough, is it?

So now, we’re happily married. I go back to work on the 12th, Spring goes back on the 10th. We’re spending this week dossing around and having a nice relaxing time before starting work again.

We’ve emptied the bank accounts to pay for the wedding, but we got 2000 yuan back from the wedding. I’m going to start saving to buy a motorbike so we can do a little travelling and Springs birthday is 16th May. I’ll tell you more about the motorbiking urge another time. Spring’s finished her make-up now and we’re heading for a walk in the park since the day is not hot and not cold, but just right. Catch you later!

P.S.: For those interested, my Chinese name is now 陈大鹰 (Chen DaYing – Chen = Family name, DaYing = Big Eagle).